We stood in line to order at Espresso Royale. As we browsed the menu, debating on what to order, the smell and warmth of fresh coffee surrounded the air around us while Zombie by The Cranberries played in the background. I turned to Andrew and made a joke about The Office when the barista notified us of our turn. I don’t remember precisely what we ordered, but what lingered in my mind was how helpful the barista was and that everything on the menu sounded divine. While we waited for our orders to arrive we looked at all the eclectic art that hung on the walls of the café and talked about our plans for the rest of day. Soon enough the barista handed over our drinks in red coffee cups with an elephant on the side, the intense heat from the coffee warming our hands up instantly. We said thank you, left the shop, and made our way to the state capitol to find a place to sit and talk. The crisp air and the visible changes of autumn surrounded us as we walked on the stone steps of the state capitol. The splashes of yellow and orange from the trees scattered all over the ground while a light breeze drove past us.
When Katrina and I were planning her visit, just weeks prior, I asked her if she would be willing to venture on a Coffee Musings journey with me. I had this vision in my head of images in the city. I blame it on the fact that I’ve been inspired lately with all the photographs on Pinterest of women looking graceful and classic as they walk the streets of big cities all around the world. While we may not live in a big city, I knew I could give my images their own city flare. I envisioned a classic ensemble, beige trench coat, denim jeans and ankle boots. I just happened to be lucky that Katrina had that exact outfit (except for that dang trench coat that we never did find…) and pulled it off better than I could have ever hoped. We sat there sipping on our drinks, the bright warm sun and the large capitol building to our backs. We watched people walk all around us as we talked about the things that sat heavy on our hearts.
Katrina
I’ve known Katrina for years, she’s one of those people who I never strived to create a relationship with, it just happened. Like sitting down at your favorite restaurant, trying something new and loving it more than you could have anticipated. My friendship with Katrina feels a bit like that, a happy accident. The very first time we spoke will always be embedded in my brain; she reached out to me via fanmail back during the days when we had popular Tumblr blogs. We immediately bonded over our love for Naruto (don’t you even judge us) and Vitamin Water, even lovingly nicknaming ourselves after our favorite flavors (Power-C and Focus where you at??). We didn’t speak to each other every day, opting for more meaningful and long letters every once in a while when we needed to check in with one another.
We kept in contact like this for years until we finally got to meet one another during the summer of 2013. Katrina was getting ready to graduate from high school and was visiting colleges all over the country. I suggested that she come visit the campus at the University of Wisconsin, during this time we still lived in a tiny old apartment just minutes away from downtown Madison and we were excited with the prospect of her going to school and living right down the street from us. During that summer, Katrina and her family came to the good ol’ cheese state to tour the university and we figured it would be the perfect opportunity for us to finally meet in person.
We met at a Five Guys restaurant in downtown Madison. I remember the walk to the restaurant so vividly, it was a sunny afternoon and the wind blew all around us as we left our car in a parking garage and walked past all the eclectic shops on State Street. I was wearing a navy blue blazer and the number of butterflies in my belly was enough to fill a conservatory. Andrew, the girls and I walked into the Five Guys and were greeted with big smiles and hugs from Katrina and her family. We treated them to lunch and we squished a few tables together as we relished the fellowship that often comes with enjoying a meal together. I was amazed by how kind and inviting her whole family was, like we’d been close friends for years. And just like that, Katrina and I’s friendship was solidified even deeper.
Once our Tumblr days were past us we still continued to keep in touch whenever too much time would pass, exchanging long detailed emails and snail mail. I still have a postcard that she sent me when she was visiting Europe during her time in college. Each time that we’d let months go by without speaking, we’d reconnect again and it would be as if no time had passed at all, even if it was just a simple text message every once in a while, our friendship still remained strong despite the distance and time that wedged itself between us.
“ True love doesn’t mean being inseparable; it means being separated and nothing changes.”
– unknown
When we finally moved into our home, I suggested that Katrina come stay with us for a few days. I promised her that if she paid for her plane ticket, that we’d take care of the rest, taking her to see all the boring sites that Wisconsin has to offer. At this time I was right in the middle of my pregnancy with Poppy and I figured it would be the perfect little distraction and calm before the storm.
One of the things I learned about Katrina when having her visit us is the embodiment of sophistication and grace that she has. I’m being completely honest when I say that I often live vicariously through her. She always amazes me with how maturely she carries herself, from her wardrobe to her conversations, everything about Katrina radiates the confidence and capability that you just don’t see in many young women nowadays. Katrina’s beautiful personality always shines the brightest whenever she visits us and I see how amazingly calm she keeps in the face of trials and how easy she rolls with the tides that the waves of life toss all around us.
With each time that Katrina comes to visit it’s almost comical with how much goes wrong. From being admitted to the hospital for high blood pressure, Andrew hitting a deer, and locking our keys in a rental van, Katrina dealt with each tribulation in a composed manner. And more than that, Katrina always had a way of pulling me from the chaos as well. During her first visit, when family dramatics hit me severely, Katrina sat with me in my favorite coffee shop and intently listening to my hardships. When Andrew and I had a failure in communication and locked the keys inside our rental van at Devil’s Lake State Park, Katrina walked around the parking lot encouraging me to vent while we waited for the mechanic to show up. In every circumstance where I felt myself hitting that tricky tightrope of breaking down, Katrina found a way to help me balance myself and all the crazy that surrounded us.
After Katrina and I stood in the small Madison airport saying our goodbyes during her last visit I felt such guilt for the discord that occurs whenever she visits. I had snuck a magazine as well as a little goodbye note in a to-go bag for her to read during her flight and in that little note I laid out my remorse and thankfulness for her grace in dealing with all the disorder, guilt wracking my thoughts from not being able to make her visits the perfect retreat that I’d envisioned for us. But sure enough just a few weeks later I opened up my mailbox to find a small note from Katrina. I opened it up to find Katrina’s beautiful tiny handwriting as she described her thankfulness for her visit and that despite the hiccups, she had an amazing time. It takes a special kind of person to be willing to handle such commotion with grace and then readily come back and do it all over again.
Sprinkled into all the craziness are the amazing memories that we created during her visits. Memories from staying up all night playing Splatoon 2, racing through our local farm’s corn maze in the dead of the night, picking out and carving our pumpkins, and of course enjoying warm coffee and meaningful conversations with one another. Katrina and I come from such different backgrounds and lead polar opposite lives but yet we find so much to connect and bond over time and time again. There’s such peace in knowing that no matter how much time may go between our conversations and visits, nothing will ever change. We’ll always be friends and she’ll always be someone who brings out the better part of me.
PHOTOGRAPHY DETAILS
Lab: PhotoVision Prints
Film: Fuji 400H @ 200 iso
Camera: Pentax 645N
Lens: 75mm @ f/2.8
